The Last Lion

FERGUSON IS SCOTTISH FOR GENIUS

It's true...I've known a few Ferguson's in my life, and most of them are, like, 1,000 points higher than any MENSA dude on the smart-scale thingy.

OBAMA IS BENNIFER

Does anybody remember an actor named Ben Affleck? 

No?

Really?

Seriously, think back a few years ago...Tall guy...From Boston...Did a movie with the guy from the Team America movie: Matt Damon...Won an Academy Award, I think?

Still not ringing any bells?

Well, Ben Affleck was a really popular actor and all-around cool guy.  He was hot, he was marketable, he was the next big thing in Hollywood.

Bueller?  Bueller?

Well, what happened to this fine young man, actor, activist, citizen, you ask? 

He hooked up with the the then hot Latina sensation - and all around evil person - Jennifer Lopez, and boy let me tell you, it was caliente!

They were the hottest couple the world has ever known.  Antony & Cleopatra?  Puhleeease!  Tracy and Hepburn? Yeah, right!  Keith Olbermann and any one of the hookers he rents? Not even close!

They were on the cover of EVERY magazine, the headline story on EVERY news entertainment show. "Bennifer Mania" swept the world.

And yet, a funny thing happened on their way to world domination...Round about six or eight months after their rise to the top, and their constant presence on every magazine cover and every TV show, people just got sick of them.

Ben Affleck became box office poison, J-Lo married some gay singer from Mexico, and they fell from the top of the mountain to the bottom of the sea.

You see, people got "Bennifer" fatigue.  They got sick of the press telling them that "Bennifer" was the greatest, most-important politician-messiah celebrity couple, EVER, and that we all MUST pay attention and care and salivate and genuflect and bow and care.

In the end, people just got sick of them...Sick as hell, in fact.

Hmm...Remind you of anyone else?  Say, a shining star politician from Illinois who came out of nowhere to become president, perhaps?  The same politician who graces the cover of damn near every magazine in existence, over whom the press salivates, and who is supposed to be a walking God on earth?

Ring any bells?

No?

Hmmm.

Let me try a different approach.

Ever heard of Huey Lewis?

BARACK AND RAHM: VICTIMS OF THEIR OWN (SEMI) SUCCESS

As I wallow in the wonderful, beautiful, wonderfullness of the total Messiah Implosion brought on by this incredibly stupid Health Care Reform push, I can't help but connect a few dots.

First off, despite what the propagandists in the Administration and the Media would like us all to believe, the evil, murderous, child-raping, black-people-killing, Republicans have NOTHING to do with the epic failure now staining Barack's hands.

Lest they forget, the Dems hold the White House, Senate, and House of Representatives, and by filibuster-proof margins, all.  The evil, nasty, earth-molesting, animal-slaughtering Republicans couldn't stop this fiasco of a bill, even if they wanted to!

No, what's killing this travesty of a bill (besides the fact that it is a completely laughable travesty) is the fact that the so-called Blue Dog Dems are opposing it.

As we all know by now, the Blue Dogs are Democrats elected to congress in strong conservative areas - mostly in the south - and in many "red" states.  In most cases, these Blue Dogs won in districts that also voted heavily for McCain and GW Bush.

How did they get elected?  They got elected because Rahm Emanuel knew that the only way to take firm control of congress was to run quasi-Republican (pro-gun, pro-war, anti-tax) Democrats in these districts. 

Just as Obama did in the general election (remember?  The Messiah President God-King ran as a tax-cutting, terrorist-killing, god-fearing, anti-gay marriage moderate?) these line-blurrers ran as good-old Republicans would, and added a touch of, "Barak's a good guy and aren't we all sick of George Bush, anyway?" for good measure.

The problem for Barry and Rahm is that, once elected, these Blue Dogs have to now face the music, especially when their standard bearer in the White House hurtles this republic pell-mell along the road to ruin, mortgages our future, and runs the country like an acid-tripping hippie in mom jeans.

This is all bad medicine for the Blue Dogs (and yes, I totally intended that pun).

So, because their mandate was never all that real - since the Blue Dogs had to pretend to be Republicans to get elected in the first place - Barry and Rahm now have to deal with all of these "Frankenstein Monsters" in this deliciously addicting health care fiasco.

The problem for our Messiah President is, the angry villagers, resplendent with their pitchforks, torches, and calls to "kill the monster" aren't going after their newly-elected Blue Dog congressmen, they're going after the smug elitists at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

I wish there was some clever saying that would tie all this up in a pretty-little bow...Something about chickens coming back home and then roosting in their old roosts, or something?

Bah...That's just too tall an order for a lovely summer morning.

OH, THE HUMANITY!

...In this video is awesome.

From some recent game involving a Mets farm team, somewhere.  Not sure what it says about me, but I can't get enough of watching douchebaggy team mascot-dudes getting hurt.  Probably has something to do with the fact that as a student at the University of Kansas I lived in a dorm with one of the male cheerleaders for the basketball team (yes, the very same 1987 NCAA Champs) and he was a total a**hole.

So, anytime I see one of his "Cheer-Brothers" go down, it makes me happy.

GOP IN 2012

You know, we've been hearing a lot about the following possibilities for the GOP Presidential nominee in 2012: Palin, Romney, Huckabee (gag), Newt, etc...

You know one name we haven't heard?

Rudy.

I'm holding out hope....

LOTS OF 'SPLAINING TO DO....

This is great...especially the question at the end from a guy in the crowd. 

BARRY V. G-DUB

This is a video that's making the rounds...Thanks to my friend from the great, wise, and wonderful state of Minnesota - home of Senator Al Franken - for the heads up!

LIKE PICKING ONE NEEDLE OUT OF A STACK OF NEEDLES, I CONFESS....

...But is there a bigger dipsh*t in all of Washington than Patrick Leahy?  Even now that Al Franken has dragged his sorry ass up there?

Perhaps an unknowable question, but I had to ask.

THOSE NASTY, PARTISAN....DEMOCRATS????

Saw this today regarding recent Supreme Court nominees...Seems that when it comes to being nasty and partisan, the Democrats lead the way.

"Senators Akaka, Inouye, Harkin, Mikulski, Kennedy, Kerry and Reid, the "Hyper-Partisan 7" I call them, voted nay on the 3 justices nominated by a Republican President (Thomas, Roberts and Alito).  Only 3 of them (Inouye, Harkin and Reid) voted yea on Souter! If you throw out Souter’s vote, you will note that including the Thomas vote, justices nominated by Democratic Presidents receive an average of 6 nays while justices nominated by Republican Presidents garner an average of 37 nays, at least when it comes to long-serving members of 'the world’s greatest deliberative body.'"

That's right, those mean Republicans tend to look at whether or not a judge is qualified...Democrats, it turns out, don't really have time for all that "qualification" mumbo-jumbo.

But as we've seen in the past, especially during the Bill Clinton sexual assaulting days, Democrats don't really care who you are or what you do, as long as you fall in line with Party Doctrine.

I wonder if Slick WIllie ever fooled around with any W.L.W.'s?*

(*- Wise Latina Women)

FRIDAY FUN

This is great...The power of editing and sound.  Maybe they'll use this on next year's Oscar telecast, now that they don't have George Bush to kick around anymore.

Have a glorious weekend.